This is where Obama made out with Michelle... Chicago you suck for pissing money away...

AP

READER ADVISORY: This story contains graphic details that may be disturbing to diabetics.

A Chicago neighborhood has proudly unveiled a bronze plaque marking the precise spot where Barack Obama first kissed Michelle Robinson 23 years ago.

No, wait. Don't click away. It gets more delicious.

Just as Mayan legend predicted, the young lawyers had only begun dating. As the closing highlight of their first South Side soiree, Obama took his future wife to a local Baskin-Robbins for ice cream. As a gallant gentleman, he escorted her outside and found a nice spot for them to sit on the parking lot curb.

There, they talked and ate ice cream, even though it does have a lot of sugar and bad fats that can clog your arteries and choke off blood supply to the heart, causing severe chest pains and even death. At one point Obama leaned over and.... Well, let him describe it, according to his quote enshrined on the 3,000-pound marker at the corner of Dorchester and 53rd:

"On our first date, I treated her to the finest ice cream Baskin-Robbins had to offer, our dinner table doubling as the curb. I kissed her, and it tasted like chocolate."

OK, now take your insulin.

There was some local Hyde Park excitement over the boulder unveiling this week because Obama is the first one-term president the South Side has ever had.

"It's a marker for the community, for posterity and tourism, too," said a spokeswoman for the site management company. The Obama kissing stone joins other South Side attractions such as the fortress occupied by Elijah Muhammad, leader of the Nation of Islam, and Obama's old barber chair, now enshrined in glass over on Blackstone Avenue.

Alas, things change, however. The holy Baskin-Robbins has moved several doors down. And a Subway sandwich shop now occupies the site. Obama didn't build either of these businesses.

But here are some sprinkles on top to ponder: Baskin-Robbins is one of the many stumbling companies resuscitated by an entrepreneurial enterprise named Bain Capital, which Mitt Romney founded and led so successfully for many years. Boy, that must have saved or created a lot of jobs.

But if Republican Romney hadn't done that so well, then these two Obama Democrats might never have had that initial chocolate kiss. And gotten married in the church of Rev. Jeremiah Wright. Michelle Obama would never have had her first moment of real pride in America. And all the other stuff that's followed.